Thursday, January 9, 2014

Being a Parent

As I sit here in my empty house (babies at Mothers Day Out and husband is at work) I find myself reading trough Facebook and Blogs.  It's been a little overwhelming at the least.  Everyone has an opinion on everything and especially when it comes to raising little ones.  As I read through the blogs and post I thought about many of the things others have said to us as we have began our family.  Here are a few...

  • If you love your kids you will home school them or put them in private school
  • If you love your kids and Jesus you will vote Republican 
  • Now that you have adopted you need to stop doing foster care so you can really love your children
  • You adopted from CPS, wouldn't a "regular" adoption have less baggage?
  • Spanking is the best 
  • Never spank your kids
  • Let your babies cry it out
  • Don't let them cry it out
  • Etc...

Like I said everyone has an opinion on everything.  It can make you crazy or make you feel you don't know what you are doing as a parent, or even as a human.  Please let me be clear that I do believe there are some absolute truths and right and wrongs.  I do however feel that each child, family, situation is different and for others to say that if you love your children you will...well its harsh, rude and just plain mean.  Come on raising kids is hard enough with out all the other voices telling you what you are doing wrong. 

How about a "hey you are doing great and your kids look so happy!"  Because I know after a day when my now 18 month old forgets how to sleep and I am so tired and my 21 month old decides he wants to throw food while we are at a restaurant while screaming and drumming on everything, a kind word is better than "I bet you could get him to stop throwing food if you would...."  

So a few confessions from this mom... sometimes my house is messy; we sometimes never get out of our jammies; I love Jesus; I want my children to love and know him; we play outside when it's cold and sometimes when it's wet; we are often loud; we love our public school system; I read to my kids; I wrestle with and kiss them a lot; we sing and dance randomly during the day; I let them cry sometimes and other times I don't; sometimes my kids make me cry; we love being foster parents and adopting from care; we make mistakes;  and we need help sometimes. 

So to all you moms and dads out there who struggle with if you are doing the right thing or not here is my two cents.  You are doing a good job (believe me as foster parents we know the difference).  I know it's hard!  I pray that we will all take time to be more encouraging this next year!

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