Wednesday, September 21, 2016

Tonight we get the opportunity to talk with a couple about adoption/foster care.  This may be one of my favorite things I get to do in life.  I love our journey and what foster care means to us.  I love talking about it. As I was thinking about it throughout the morning I thought about how different life is now that we are adoptive parents and biological parents.

It has been three years in November since we adopted our daughter.  Three years, I cannot believe it.  So what is different?  How has it changed us?  Why should someone consider adoption through foster care.  The easy answer is because it blesses you and gives you a joy you never thought you needed.  It has changed us for the better.  

But lets be honest for a few moments.  It is hard.  It is hard.  It is hard! This is not for the weak of heart.  We have spent lots of hours in tears over the kids in and out of our home.  Lots of prayer, lots of trips to the doctor, counseling and schools.  I was not naive and knew once we adopted that the trauma of the past would just not disappear.  However, what I did not take in account for was how I felt lonely in this world of adoption-how people just didn't get it or know what to say.  The pain of trauma looks different in each of our adoptive kiddos and how to figure out what is best for each child does not come easy even for this social worker momma.   I did not prepare myself for how protective I would feel of their sweet little spirits.  I did not think we would barely get to sleep (it is getting better!!!!)  and that my decisions based on no sleep would not always be my best.  These are the things I wish someone would have told me.  I would not change a thing, and will gladly sleep two hours so my child feels safe, but I do wish I have had a better idea.  So if you are thinking of foster care or adoption please talk to people who have gone before you in this.  They have been my life savers.  Surround yourself with friends and family who will listen and though will not always get it, they are there!

But honestly it is the most beautiful thing we have done.  I love what it has taught me about Christ and His love for me, my family, my friends, my neighborhood and the world.  I am sure looking after His kids is a hard tasks and He always knows when to give mercy and when to discipline.  I also love we are always a walking advertisement for foster care.  For those who may not know, our kids are black, brown and white--one of each!  We get lots of questions and mostly people are truly interested.  What an opportunity God has given us to share His Love with others around us.  We get to invite our friends into our world and share with them.  We get to talk to strangers about who our Lord is!  So this, this is the reason I would tell you to consider foster care and adoption.  Yes, you will change a child's life or two, you will be blessed as well, but you get to share about how God helps you through it all.  You have a way to always bring up His love.  I did not expect this outcome. We love because He first loved us and because of that we choose foster care and adoption.  Join us!

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Saturday, September 3, 2016

It's 4:30 in the morning and my whole house is sleeping.  I however am wide awake.  Tonight we heard about the passing of a sweet lady who was near and dear to the youth ministry Buck and I serve in.  It's hard to wrap my mind around it.  And as I do when someone I know passes away I begin to reflect on life which brought me to Facebook since it's full of reminders of memories (and this blog I forgot I had).

Tonight  I had few friends over.  As we gathered at the table for treats and drinks I couldn't help but feel blessed.  I have joked many times saying that making friends as an adult is the hardest thing I have ever done but I am thankful for that hard.  Scripture teaches us that God did not desire for us to do life alone.   He wants us to have community to share in the hard times and rejoice in the good times together.  I am thankful for my community.  To be honest there are times I am not sure if Buck and I could survive without our community of friends and family.

And since it is now almost 5 am and I cannot or should not call you all I wanted to say thank you.  Thank you to our people.  You know who you are.  Thank you for listening to our struggles.  Thank you for taking my kids for fun outings or for watching them when we needed help.  Thank you for eating with us and for feeding us at times.  Thank you for praying with us and for us.  Thank you for listening to us.  Thank you for laughing with us.  Thank  you for crying with us.  Thank you for loving our family well.  Our life, my life, is richer because of you.

So I ask you as I am taking time to reflect on life in the wee hours of the morning to do the same.  What are you thankful for?  My youth minister my senior year and now dear friend says all the time "people are more important than things."  I always believed him and tried to live by this mantra.  However, the older I get the messier life gets at times I am more aware than ever of just how true it is.  Today I am thankful for my community and my people.